When Simone first learned that her wife was addicted to heroin, she had no idea she was even taking drugs. Her wife said she’d used drugs when she was younger, but it was always discussed in the past tense.
Simone’s wife had been in recovery for five years – most of the time they had been together – but had relapsed months before Simone found out.
“I was in shock and didn’t know where to turn.”
Simone's wife mentioned that Forward’s ReNew service - which was supporting her - had a service for family and friends, so Simone got in touch.
Staff from the ReNew service invited Simone to have a chat with a caseworker, so they could understand her situation and talk through her options. She decided the weekly family group meetings would be the best fit, so she could meet other people who were experiencing similar things.
“The group wasn’t what I expected: I thought it would teach me what I could do to help my wife ‘get better’. I didn’t realise it was about helping me cope and address my feelings.
“Being part of the group made me feel safe. It was comforting to know that others were going through the same thing. I learnt that there’s no right way to feel and to not be so hard on myself. Mostly though, it taught me that I’m not alone.”
Simone has now graduated and stays in regularly contact with a new friend from the group. When everything first happened, she felt very alone, so having someone who understands what’s going on really helped Simone feel at ease.
“I’ve learnt a huge amount from ReNew: from not enabling my wife’s behaviour, to setting healthy boundaries, and making sure we don’t keep things a secret.
“The family group at ReNew has saved my mental health and my relationship. Before I started going, I couldn’t go on. I have so much gratitude and appreciation for the team. I don’t know where I or my relationship would be without them.”
Please note that Simone’s name has been changed to protect her privacy.
